The Art of Parenting | Brahma Kumaris

Introduction: Parenting is one of life’s most rewarding yet challenging journeys—requiring a balance of love, patience, and wisdom. The Art of Parenting explores how to nurture a child’s growth—not just physically, but also emotionally, spiritually & morally—while also 'growing as a parent' yourself. This detailed article-post offers simple yet meaningful 'insights' along with related links & helpful videos. The following was written for the parents of a 12-year old child, but it holds meaning and value for parents with children of any age.

Title: "𝙍𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙖 12-𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙤𝙡𝙙"

Subtitle:

𝙵𝚘𝚛 𝙴𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝙿𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝: 𝙻𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚗 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚗 𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚢. 𝙶𝚞𝚒𝚍𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚘𝚗 '𝚎𝚍𝚞𝚌𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗' & '𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚛-𝚋𝚞𝚒𝚕𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐'

{ A must read for EVERY parent }

Index

Introduction

Foreword

How to Raise Children

Children & Education

Moral, Ethical, Spiritual

Teaching Honesty

Helpful Videos

✶𝗔𝗱𝗺𝗶𝗻: 𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘧𝘶𝘭, 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘶𝘮 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 (𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺/𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴). 𝘏𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 & 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴. "𝙎𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙨 𝙎𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜"

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The following was written in response to a query we received on our Samadhan WhatsApp group in March 2025. So please read the following in the same context.

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𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗲𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱

Parenting has growing impact in this time. Since the surge of the internet & social media, the new generation of children have access to all the world's information. Having everything one click away is a great power, which, if not understood and used correctly, may easily spoil their childhood & the rest of life. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 in the present time, is to "be a role model" and "earnestly engage" with their child's life. To inspire and bring out the best in your children. This response-article is for every parent.

🍀There are several things I must point for you to remember, before we get to the main part of this response:

In the present time➙

● Children have a lot many 'distractions'

● Children are more 'sensitive' than ever

● Societal 'norms' are changing

● Children are surrounded by technology from a young age

● Schools & education system is more competitive & fruitless than ever

☝️Keep this in mind in order to fully understand 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝'𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞. They are seeing a very different world. The 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 (age 2 to 10) is when parents are closest to their children (emotionally). Children immitate their parents. This is how they learn in the early childhood.

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𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝗶𝘀𝗲 𝗖𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗿𝗲𝗻

We believe, and as per the traditional knowledge written in the ancient Indian texts—parents should raise their offsprings 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐲 (with great love) in the early years (𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝟖 𝐨𝐫 𝟗)—after which they would teach them "life-lesson" and "moral values" (𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝟏𝟓)... And finally, as children become mature, parents should "befriend" them—unconditonally support & advise them as a friend, recognise their 𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚒𝚟𝚒𝚍𝚞𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚢, treat them as your 𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐬, and give them 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐨𝐦 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞.

🪻This, according to me, is the best way to raise children, no matter the time & age—First give them 𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐭 & 𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 (till age 8), then 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐬, 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐬 & 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐬 (the 'wisdom' that you have acquired), and finally as they learn and mature by the age of 15 or 16, 𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 '𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝'.

🪴If you follow this way, you will raise 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠, 𝐚𝐝𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧 who would not only excel in education, but also in the real life. They will create meaningful, lasting relationships, and contribute 'positively' to the society.

𝗖𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗿𝗲𝗻 & 𝗘𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻

I firmly believe, that children should be allowed (and supported) to study and pursue the subject they truly 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 & 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲 studying. This is the only way to a positive growth. Education should NOT be centred around academic performance and exams; but teaching children '𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠'... Education is not teaching "what" to think & what to remember, but "how" to think. Fostering 'curiosity' & 'creativity' is the purpose.

🍁So 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐞𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧—it is either because the subjects doesn't interest them, or it is the way of teaching. Sometimes, you may love a subject, but not your teacher's way of teaching... Therefore, as a parent, the first thing you should ask and learn from your child, is how do they to be supported, WHAT exactly interests them. It could be anything, even art or sports, as long as they are serious about it. But do advise them to consider taking one of the "main subjects" and then explain them the 𝐟𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞/𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐭𝐬 of studying it.

🍇Sit with them and have them "explore the internet" to find the possibilities with each subject. See what appeals them. 𝐄𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐮𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 '𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐞' 𝐚𝐧𝐝 '𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐬'. Because you know that only when we LOVE and ENJOY doing something, can we achieve success in it. Lastly, do not pressurize them to take instant decisions. Intead, 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡, and then come to you for further guidance. This way, you can raise thoughtful and responsible children.

🌈In this way, the perfect approach is—"keeping a balance" between 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐢𝐬𝐞 & 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭, and also allowing your children 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭. Once you teach your children moral values, principles and life-skills, your role as a parent remains of providing support and guidance (not directing & controlling their life)

🌳Remember—𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 & 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 is a good thing. Children should act like children, not adults. They are meant to 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞, 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐢𝐬𝐞, 𝐫𝐮𝐧, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥. This is the natural way. So instead of keeping them indoors all day, do allow and 'encourage' them 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 or do any form of 𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲. But of course, also keep the 𝙗𝙖𝙡𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 (as we explained).

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𝗠𝗼𝗿𝗮𝗹, 𝗘𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹 & 𝗦𝗽𝗶𝗿𝗶𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹 𝗘𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻

In my opinion, there is no bigger role of a parent than to 𝕔𝕦𝕝𝕥𝕚𝕧𝕒𝕥𝕖 𝕧𝕒𝕝𝕦𝕖𝕤 & 𝕡𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕔𝕚𝕡𝕝𝕖𝕤 in their children. They are 'values' that define us as a human being, not our social status, education, or appearance.

🌼Moral, ethical, and spiritual principles does shape the 'character' of every child. Parents and caregivers can foster empathy and integrity 𝐛𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬, 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐲, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 in their own every day life, while encouraging children to reflect on their choices, actions & its consequences (by being an example of honesty & integrity)

🍎Parents should engage in age-appropriate 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭—explaining with the help of 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜, 𝚌𝚞𝚕𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜, 𝚘𝚛 𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚝𝚑-𝚋𝚊𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜. This is a practical way of imparting values & virtues in your children.

🌷Encouraging them to help you in daily work, helping community, volunteering, and acts of service—nurtures 𝐚 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 '𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲' 𝐚𝐧𝐝 '𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧'. Perhaps most importantly—parents should practise 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, and also encourage children.

Learn Mindfulness meditation⇗

Learn RajYog Meditation

𝗧𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘁𝘆

Parents can inspire honesty in children by themselves being a role model of honesty and integrity.

The way is—

● Create a 'welcoming space' for telling the truth without fear of judgement or criticism.

● 𝙰𝚌𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠𝚕𝚎𝚍𝚐𝚎, 𝚙𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚜𝚎 and even 𝚛𝚎𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚍 their honesty.

● Engage in 'open conversations' about the impact of dishonesty on mutual trust and relationships, showing 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 as a 'strength' rather than a burden.

● Encourage critical thinking by asking questions like, “𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘪𝘧 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶?” to foster empathy and inspire them to open up.

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